Chunk O story.

Just kinda blabbered on no real point to this but instead of deleted it I am dumping it on the internet. I Haven't edited it for punctuation/grammar/sanity. So read at own risk.

Across the fields of sharp green blades of grass and shoots a warrior stood with a large sword above his head.
This weapon was held aloft in such a manner that the handle pointed towards his toes and the tip towards the sun.
A most honourable pose must be assumed by great warriors preparing for battle. This man stood against many like the great heroes. A sea of enemy soldiers swayed in the distance. Their countless heads honeycombing the battle field. He alone stood before the mass. His erect weapon grew taller.
A steel shaft of such immense proportions that held pointed so it's weight began to sink down on the hero. Even his vascular ham hock arms couldn't burden the mighty weapon in the air for so long.
He cast it aside with disdain spitting contemptuously. Replacing it with an inflatable rubber tube a new battle stratagem formed itself within his expansive mind. Engorging several more tubes with air he worked quickly before the darkening horde descended. Closer it drew and faster he pumped.
Inflating the walls of each cylindrical synthetic apparatus with such speed and ferocity the grass beneath him fluttered. Scores then hundreds then thousands of tubes were inflated. Behind the statuesque mountain of a man grew a great pile of rubber tubes. A heap so great it shaded the land for miles.
The last tube squeakily bounced into it's resting position crowning the great mound with finality.
The enemy arrived. Oratory spewed from fighter driven by intellect and flowing like a thunderous river. With granite logic and oil slick charm he created unrest and then steadied it. He elicited the fullest spectrum of human emotion. Like rolling hills the men before sunk and rose along with the words.
The climax brought about a thunderclap of silence.
So powerful and silent some fell to their knees.
When finally the bravest of the lot strode forward and replaced his weapon with the inflatable rubber tube.
The rest followed en suite. When the last grasped the once crowning rubber they all began child like games and water activities halting the war that teetered maliciously seconds before.
The hero had done his duty and relished with an audible victory thwack to the enemy generals right shin.